myfairlaydee

Fetish.

2012-02-19T22:11:00.002+08:00

I don't know if I'm the only one who has this major fetish for footballers but I have a serious attraction for them. Black or white, don't seem like an issue. I guess here are the reasons why;

1) How mad they get when they're so close to scoring and they don't.
2) The smiles on their faces when do score a goal, priceless, charming.
3) The determination and passion on their faces when their on field, sexy.
4) I love how their personality vary on and off pitch.

I can never see myself falling for someone who don't play soccer at all.

My bestfriend's 3rd year anniversary,

2012-02-15T23:35:00.001+08:00

So happy for this girl. She definitely deserve all the happiness in the world. Well, she is happy, and Asri is definitely one main source of happiness in her life. Happy third year you lovebirds! ♥

Such an inspiring story.

2012-02-13T01:44:00.000+08:00

"Saya mahu dikenali sebagai wanita Muslim." - Wardina Saffiyah

Current favourite.

2012-02-12T22:43:00.003+08:00

Big step.

2012-02-11T18:00:00.001+08:00

Suddenly hits me, that once I graduate from Republic Polytechnic, this school that I truly adore and love, I am not a student anymore. I won't have -teen behind my age anymore. I've spent 13 years of my life, studying, focusing on exams, assignments, mixing with all kind of people, made good friends, been in and out of love, all those puppy loves. Those days, are going to be over for me soon. It's a new beginning for me, this is really just the start. Soon, it'll be work, responsibility, money, and eventually marriage.

I am not prepared for any of those. All my life, I've wanted to grow up, said to people I want to grow up, get a job, get married, I want kids, lots of kids. But I forget about all those costs and responsibilities that comes along with those WANTS. 20 may not be that huge of a number, but it sure is a wake up call for me. Work is no joke, every single day, half of your day gone, you're tired from work, you can't "hang out" with your friends, late dinner, karaoke all those fun things to do. Big step. Sure is.

IVP Finals 2012.

2012-02-11T02:34:00.004+08:00

Went to NYP for the IVP Finals, RP unfortunately lost against TP in a penalty shootout. That's the nature of a game, someone has to lose. But though the boys wanted to win so bad since it's the last year in RP for some of them, they put up a good fight and I guess that's all that matters. Especially proud of my boy :)

Was accompanied by Nadiah who was supporting her own school and of course, Syah. Had a light dinner at the "after-party" and headed back to Tampines with Ali BY BUS. Heheh, finally get to put my head on his shoulder. It's not always fun having your own transport yknow. So anw, met Safirul and they both had their dinner at Simpang Bedok before heading to HOME SWEET HOME.

Ali's leaving me for Brunei in a few hours for his S League match against a Brunei team; DPMM. Hope he gets to play over there and play good. All the best, jia you! Hehe.

RP receiving their medal.

IVP.

2012-02-09T23:08:00.003+08:00

One week of study break. One week of UT and I'm a free bitch baby. Okay not really. I still have to come back school for 4.1 because being I'm the dumb-est girl in the world. Can spend just three years in school, I choose to spend another 6 months. Sigh. But it's fine I guess. Not as though I'm gonna continue my studies after this? Haha, with my GPA, well.... fat hope.

I've been spending so much time watching soccer these past weeks. Yea, I'm one of those girls who is always seen with their boyfriend. But that's only because I don't have that much friends and I like it better that way because more friends = more dramas, and I don't wanna deal with any of those. I'm happy with just going with the flow... spending time with people only closest to me like Nad, Ifah, Ali.

Then again, it doesn't matter that I'm always with my boyfriend, as long as I'm not those clingy girls who needs to touch their boyfriend every single second, mwahh here mwahh there, hug here hug there, I think it's fine. Afterall, who the hell cares about what others have to say? Every one has their own opinion.

Talking about that, I think some people sees me as someone who talks alot on FB, on twitter but not really a noisy person outside. That's total bullshit. I am noisy, I am loud, I do talk alot, but only with people I'm comfortable with. Just because I am quiet with certain people, that does not mean I am fake. That goes back to why I just dislike being surrounded by too many "friends" cause they will talk crap about you, eventhough they really don't know you that well. Hah.

Okay, to end off, IVP Final is TOMORROW at NYP, Republic Polytechnic vs Temasek Polytechnic. Come come come, support RP.

Handsome right RP team... still don't wanna come and support? Meh, your loss, hehe!

Date with the bestfriend.

2012-02-09T22:42:00.003+08:00

Glad I got to meet this lovely lady after so so so long. Had a great time, catching up, talking about almost everything we can think of, having a feast at East Coast Park. She's irreplaceable, the bond we have, is amazing. We're not the kind of bestfriend who meets all the time, we're busy with our own things; school, boyfriend, family and of course other friends. We don't have to meet often but when we do meet, feels like it was just yesterday, no awkwardness, k what the hell am I saying? HAHA, bottom line is, I love this bimb(which claims to be), xx.

It's been days now.

2012-01-29T02:02:00.001+08:00

Hi, I miss you, dear boy :')

I think Scott's a great guy, despite all his flaws.

2012-01-18T21:09:00.003+08:00

"At the end of the day, I admit, I am on some kind of a leash. And the truth is, I love it. If I wasn't on that leash, I don't know where I'd be. That's why I love Kourtney, because she knows what I need."

- Scott Disick

I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily.

2012-01-17T15:22:00.000+08:00

I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough

I'm giving you all my love, I'm still looking up.

HZF.

2012-01-15T18:30:00.001+08:00

I miss you. Nyeh.

All eyes on the boy.

2011-12-26T17:43:00.001+08:00

Astaghfirullah.

2011-12-23T01:55:00.006+08:00

"Aku adalah seorang hamba yang fakir, sesungguhnya kami fakir dan memerlukan."
"Indeed I am a faith beggar, indeed we are poor and hoping for your givings."

I know I'm not perfect, but I promise I will try my best.. from the way I dress to the things I say and do,

insyaAllah.

Going back home.

2011-12-18T17:35:00.009+08:00

Enjoy.

Karaoke, Sheesha, Seoul Garden.

2011-12-18T16:55:00.001+08:00

Thankful for the kind of people I'm surrounded with. Period.

Dad.

2011-12-17T21:16:00.002+08:00

Just a few more months to your 2nd death anniversary. Trust me, I still feel your presence at home. I imagine going home to you, with your hilarious combed back afro hair, lying at the sofa, watching soccer and giving me the widest smile anyone could ever give me, even when I know, I've made a mistake by going home late. Just so you know, I don't get that very often now which makes me miss you even more.

Maybe what you became while you were here is partly my/our fault too. We never gave you a chance, we never tried to understand your anger, your misery, your loneliness. To have everyone pointing out only your mistakes, is hard. I feel like shit experiencing it myself, what more you? Who have been going through it for years and years and you still failed to get to us. Afterall, what's worst than going home to a house of three daughters who don't even bother to greet you. I am sorry, Dad :'(

You doted on me, and it's truly disappointing that I have to lose you to realize that. I won't deny and say that I haven't been a good daughter from the start and even when I've lost you, I still haven't been a good one. I often forget that you are relying on your daughters' prayers up there. I'm sorry I haven't done anything for you, I really am. From today onwards, I promise you... I won't never leave my prayers because that's the only time I can communicate with God to keep you safe and lighten your punishments. I miss you.

Dream of Californication

2011-12-12T02:00:00.001+08:00

Listen To Your Heart

2011-12-12T01:38:00.005+08:00

HELP!

2011-12-11T22:50:00.000+08:00

BLOGSHOP

Best girlfriend.

2011-12-07T23:38:00.001+08:00

Please know that, even if things aren't the same anymore, or we don't meet that often anymore, no one can ever replace you in that special spot I have reserved specially in my heart(cheh so mushy), and I totally mean it. Love you, Nadiah, hehehe <3 I'm sorry I haven't been making time for you though I'm not that busy, one day, I promise. Sorry again :'(

World's most annoying girlfriend.

2011-12-07T23:32:00.000+08:00

*Ali watches video*

Me: Tengok video ape? (Watching what video?)
Ali: Motorbike.
Me: Huh? Girl?
Ali: Motorbike.
Me: Girl?
Ali: Motorbike.
Me: Bukan girl? Abeh ape? (Not girl? Then what?)
Ali: No, motorbike.
Me: Oh, pasal girl? (Oh, about girl?)

And I was handed an award for being the world's most annoying girlfriend. But it's damn cute that he didn't get tired of answering. Hahaha! Love you la Ali <3

New job, new environment.

2011-11-28T01:56:00.000+08:00

Wasn't such a meaningful weekend, but I'm glad I got to spend time with my sister. Initial plan was to head to cotton on then Iluma's new look, but we found out Iluma's new look has closed down. So luckily the dresses that I saw at woodland's cotton on were at bugis's else it would have been a wasted trip. Glad I got the two dresses, wanted to finish my discounts and leave cotton on for good. It's about time I find another job. Town area is find with me now. Since school is gonna finish in a few more months, traveling wouldn't be a problem. This new job I'm looking out for, has a higher pay, so I'm kinda hyped up about it. Hehehe. Hopefully, insyaAllah I get it ;) School in less than 12 hours, and I'm not asleep, I need sleeping pills, ok bye......

Perfect lyrics.

2011-11-28T01:39:00.003+08:00

"When the night falls on you, you don't know what to do. Nothing you confess, could make me love you less."

"When you're standing at the crossroads and don't know which path to choose. Let me come along, 'cause even if you're wrong, I'll stand by you."

Love.

2011-11-21T02:14:00.001+08:00

You don't have to make it happen, it just happens, sometimes with people you least expect to. And when it finally happens, it's what you've chosen, it's not a joke anymore. You work for it, and it will last.

This, is what we have.

2011-11-21T01:44:00.002+08:00

Love is a temporary madness, it erupts like volcanoes and then subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion, it is not the desire to mate every second minute of the day, it is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every cranny of your body. No, don’t blush, I am telling you some truths. That is just being “in love”, which any fool can do. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

- Louis de Berniéres Captain Corelli’s Mandolin

Imperfections.

2011-11-21T01:43:00.000+08:00

I might not be the prettiest one in my bunch of girlfriends. I may not always look good in everything that I wear. I don't have the dreamy wardrobe like some other girls. Some of my pictures may look awkward. I don't make the funniest jokes, like some others. I may not be a good entertainer for everyone. Some might not even like being around me. I have my days, days where I feel insecure, where I feel like, I'm no good at all. Days I feel like I can never be as pretty as some other girls, can never dress as good as them. Days that I feel so alone.

My point is, I'm not always at my best and I'm not perfect but that's what makes me, and nobody else. On top of all those, it's also difficult to trust people nowadays, you just don't know their intentions, whether they really care or they just want to know. I don't even know who to call... my friends.

True love.

2011-11-21T00:06:00.001+08:00

It's nice to see others have faith in us. It's really sweet. Hopefully, insyaAllah, hehe. This will definitely make my week.

My favourite three.

2011-11-19T03:14:00.003+08:00

Mac -> Man's Crib -> Changi Village -> Changi Beach -> Home

A day well spent.

30th.

2011-11-19T02:35:00.000+08:00

You know I might not know everything about soccer, I will never understand when offside occurs but you know I am always very supportive of you when it comes to your passion. Because I believe you deserve something for the the sacrifices and your hard work. Never give up, because I know one day, it will all be paid off. Happy 30th month my man ;)

Pretty much sums up my short getaway to Batam.

2011-11-12T02:45:00.001+08:00

What I know is, you're worth the fight.

2011-11-12T01:08:00.003+08:00

Too much emotions and thoughts I don't know how to summarize them to be put into words. All I know is, I'm still in this war. Fighting for this. No I'm not going to give in to this shitty feeling I'm having. I mean after all that we've been through, just this, is not worth it. After all, since we haven't been spending too much quality time together, feelings like this are bound to happen. Hopefully things get better after tomorrow, insyallah.

Weak on the outside, strong on the inside.

2011-11-03T01:34:00.000+08:00

Maybe I'm not good keeping my emotions and crying is my way of dealing with it. But that doesn't necessarily mean I'm weak. I'm just very sensitive at heart. By crying, I'm actually dealing with my emotions. I don't like to keep everything inside me, because I know it won't do me any good. I don't want to be one those people who keep their emotions, look tough on the outside but is feeling miserable inside. To me, by dealing with my emotions, even if it means having to show it all the time, crying, I get stronger. So quit saying I'm weak. I may be sensitive and emotional but I'm strong, maybe not on the outside but definitely on the inside :)

I never told you.

2011-11-02T23:58:00.002+08:00

I wish you were my first love.

2011-10-24T10:59:00.000+08:00

But maybe if you were, I wouldn't have appreciated you as much as I do now.

Qistina's 2nd birthday.

2011-10-21T00:51:00.003+08:00

The deco.

The lucky draw gifts for the kids.

This was the only way to make her change into her outfit. Make up.

My two gorgeous sister, one less feeling feeling than other. HAHA.

My favourite nephew, not only because he's so handsome, he's very very helpful too.

The cute birthday girl.; Qistina.

And her two favourite cousins! In the same outfit which is so adorable.

Family picture!

That little boy is so handsome. Kind of envy qis that she got a kiss from him!

Qis's (almost) whole family.

See! She's so adorable.

Ain't she the most gorgeous toddler you've ever seen? :)

Guess who's in that outift. It's my second sister! Hahaha.

Opening up presents.

A two year old having an iPad for her birthday. This is not right! What is happening to the world?
I don't even have an IPHONE! Hahahaha!

Last saturday.

2011-10-21T00:05:00.001+08:00

Date with ifah over dinner and hangout at mbs. Ended the day with a last minute plan to catch 'Real Steel' with ali and stanely at marina square followed by supper at Spize. Real Steel was great by the way.

Sigh.

2011-10-20T23:30:00.000+08:00

Man: But.. it's just different for a guy.

Woman: Why is it different? Is it different in the sight of Allah?

3 events.

2011-10-15T13:39:00.002+08:00

School; so far so good. My classmates aren't so bad, explains why. But anyway, forget that..

Went to CCK stadium with an, ayit, syawal and aubrey on monday if I'm not wrong to watch the U23 S'pore vs U23 Thailand match. The boys won with the score 3-2 , winning goal scored by shahfiq, in the last few minutes. Ali played good too :) Happy for him. Doesn't matter what others said, he's the best. Ended off the day with supper at Saffrons, waited for Ali to come and headed back home.

On Wednesday, had a surprise birthday celebration for Safirul, planned by his sister and farhan. Surprised him at his place, with cake, pizza and some KFC :) It was a good celebration, knowing how much he appreciated those who came and was involved and seeing how happy and surprised he look, I guess his sister knows it was all worth it. I wish I had a brother. We end up playing kinect till it was time to go home. Hahaha.

Firman had his off day on Thursday, so we decided to meet up, together with his NS friend, aidil. Had lunch at food culture then headed to starbucks to chill, and I don't know from where the idea came, we both went karaoke at grandlink to kill time, before I meet alice to get my 'new baby'. Hehehe. Ali and ifah joined us at Tampines soonafter, had our little catch up before leaving for home.

I'm a happy girl, Alhamdulillah :)

You.

2011-10-11T01:09:00.001+08:00

Tell me I'm obsessed, but I have never had so much faith in someone before. You gave me something to believe in.

Just two more days.

2011-10-03T03:33:00.000+08:00

Holiday's ending soon. Obviously, I'm dreading the thought of it. School = early morning, draggy classes, annoying classmates, boring facilitators, early nights, and FYP. I don't even think I can go through that whole stressful process again. I screwed up too much this time, sigh.

Put that aside, on a higher note, the past few days or maybe the last weekend was really enjoyable. I'd give credits to the people I spent it with. Nad, Ali, Yul, Man, Afiq and little bit of Ifah. Hehe, I finally got to meet that lady, missed her. Friday was spent with Nad, sitting down at MBS, have our hardcore camwhoring time, as usual ;) Glad we set aside at least a day for each other before school reopens.

Saturday was supposed to be a rest day for me and babe, it was actually for me, cause I woke up at 6PM, and felt hungry immediately, hehe, so I asked babe to accompany me for dinner and we ended up meeting Yul, Man and Ifah at Mac. Ifah left soonafter and Man was hungry so we went to Saffron and then met up with Afiq to accompany him. Just sitting down with them, talking and laughing, feels really blissful. To be surrounded with people like that, being totally myself, I'm happy :) Went home late, and felt really bad, cause mom give me too much face already, sigh. Sorry mom.

As a result of coming home late and not having enough sleep/rest, babe and I cancelled our plan to the zoo and even our back-up plan to science centre because AS IF we didn't late enough, this boy just had to take his own sweet time getting ready that I felt that our trip all the way to Jurong won't be worth it anymore. So we headed to NEX just to check the place out and then ECP to have our seafood feast.

He was having a hard time with his bleeding throat, so I had to finish up most of the food. I didn't know I could finish up that MUCH food, seriously. After dinner, we caught Johnny English (HILARIOUS) and we couldn't get enough of the gossips on the previous nights so we ended our day with another gossip session with Man, Afiq and Yul. Hehehe.

Overall, the last three days was beyond fun and once again, I thank the people I spent them with :)

The roles he play.

2011-10-02T07:19:00.001+08:00

With no one, he's a bestfriend.
With my friends, he's a boyfriend.
With his friends, he's a friend.
With my family, he's a brother.
With his family, he's Ali.

Fact #4.

2011-09-28T05:51:00.001+08:00

"I want to explore the whole world. Camera in one hand, the other hand holding you close."

Fact #3.

2011-09-28T05:42:00.001+08:00

To hell with cute guys, I can find them anywhere. But good guys, they're rare, so why would I trade my good guy for a cute guy. No chance.

Fact #2.

2011-09-28T05:36:00.001+08:00

"Having a sister is like having a best friend you cannot get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there."

-Khloe Kardashian

Fact #1.

2011-09-28T05:00:00.001+08:00

"For once in my life I don't have to try to be happy. When I'm with you it just happens."

He definitely is a keeper.

2011-09-24T07:08:00.002+08:00

Someone asked me what makes Ali different from the others. I didn't have an answer at that point of time. Now I do. It's because he don't drink, he don't club, he don't smoke, he knows how to make me laugh and because I know I can trust him. I know he won't cheat on me. He have never gave me a reason to doubt him, never. Well I hope he won't break my trust though :) 99.9% sure he won't. With him, there's really nothing to worry about, even when he's far away from me, like right now :)

Oh and another thing, we can go for as long as we want, not kissing or hugging each other, and still love each other the same. Like he have said before, "Doesn't mean I don't kiss you, I don't love you ok?" He is one of the not so many people I know of, with a really huge heart and is so humble, really. Not saying it just for the sake of it, and because he's my boyfriend. He's just special, as a person, and for me :) It's definitely not because he's a soccer player, that's utter bullshit. I don't think I can stay happy with someone for this long if it was only because of that reason(though it's a plus point that he is, cause i love soccer players).

The list just goes on if I were to continue on the things I like about him, but later you all wanna vomit, or menyampah, so might as well don't :P His parents must have done all the right things in bringing him up. I'd give credits to them cause I would want my children to be just like him. Heehee :)

P.S. I'm blogging through phone! :O It's like a dream come true. Now whenever I'm bored and can't sleep, I know what to do. This is perfect!

The boys I grew up with.

2011-09-24T04:32:00.002+08:00

Blessing in disguise.

2011-09-24T04:25:00.010+08:00

Suddenly it's Saturday. Just one more day, and you're back in my arms :) Hehe, I guess it wasn't so bad afterall, it was a good week actually, not because he wasn't here. I guess it was good we had time off from each other, everyone know we needed that. I missed you, I just didn't mind that you weren't here.

Anyway, the week was spent wisely, with Massy, the boys, my sisters and will be spending today with my family. It started off with a nice catch up with Massy over lunch at Swensens. Almost everytime we meet, we eat Swensens, we don't meet that often, that's why we can afford that. Hahaha. I like how we're never awkward with each other. That explains why she was/is my bestfriend :')

Followed by a last minute raya outing with the boys, I found out about the outing just one day before the actual day. I went to sleep, already decided that I didn't wanna tag along but just 5 minutes after I woke up, Din called me up(which I didn't answer) and texted me to ask me to meet him first before we proceed to the first house which I suddenly agreed on and actually followed them. I didn't regret it though cause I had fun? Hanging out with them, reminded me of why I used to be so close to them. They are the sweetest boys. You girls complain about this world not having enough loyal guys? Well, then you haven't open up your eyes wide enough, because I have a bunch of guyfriends who are actually loyal to their girlfriends/the people they love.

Yesterday, our(muimui and I) initial plan was to shop since Cotton On is having sale. We thought of having lunch then leave for Cotton On and the flea at Cathay building, but it turns out that there were nothing interesting at both Cotton Ons we went to and the flea was beyond pathetic. So since we have been planning to play Kinect for quite awhile and since everyone was free, we decided to play Kinect at Playnation! Had alot of fun, and we all went home with jiggly arms and legs. Hehehe, but it was all worth it, thanks to my future brother-in-law for paying :)

Ahhhhh, I feel so refreshed and happy now, but I have to sleep soon, cause I don't wanna meet my cousins tomorrow with ugly panda eyes :/ I love and miss you Ali Hudzaifi. Hehe.

Nights ♥

Falling away with you.

2011-09-21T02:37:00.000+08:00

"So I'll love whatever you become

And forget the reckless things we've done

I think our lives have just begun."

"You don't know you're beautiful. That's what makes you beautiful."

2011-09-21T00:56:00.001+08:00

:) takut nah. cute.

What happened to us?

2011-09-20T00:50:00.014+08:00

I can barely imagine the three of us on random meetups and having fun anymore. If that day ever happens, I promise, that'll be one of the happiest days of my life, cause I've been yearning for that, for so long. I can literally cry just thinking about this. I miss you both, precious girls, together :'(

"If you ask me how I'm doing, I would say I'm doing just fine."

2011-09-19T23:40:00.000+08:00

Amina Mastura.

2011-09-19T18:16:00.004+08:00

We can go for a year not meeting each other and still not feel awkward talking to each other about everything.

Thanks for the short meetup, love you.

'Cause you're the cutest and I love you so much.

2011-09-18T23:05:00.003+08:00

Thanks for being there for me, always.. always :) Thanks for never giving up on me. You're the one who gives me the strength to get pass all those crazy shits. How can I ever find a replacement if I ever have to? Happy 28th month my man, my love, my pillar of strength. I love you, more than you'll ever know. I'm serious.

"It's not always happy endings, but it's all the in-between."

2011-09-18T22:52:00.005+08:00

"When love just isn't everything you want, but it's everything you need.

It's not always happy endings, but it's all the in-between.

It's taken so long, so log to finally see that your love is worth the best."

Hello Ho Chi Minh

2011-09-18T02:19:00.004+08:00

My baby here is leaving me in less than 24 hours. And though I'm gonna miss you so much, with this heavy heart(cheh dramatic), I hope you have a safe journey to and fro, enjoy your time there, do your best if you get to play and I'm proud of you sweetheart. Your princess here will always be there for you, cheering for you, supporting you :')

Also, thanks for the beautiful day today, I love you Ali Hudzaifi MY, *blow kisses*

He must be the one.

2011-09-11T02:45:00.002+08:00

*blows kisses*

You've made me a better person, no doubt.

You.

2011-09-08T19:52:00.003+08:00

"You put your arms around me, and I'm home."

Cause even if it doesn't seem like it, they're still the ones I love the most.

2011-09-08T01:47:00.002+08:00

Ifah Dimps ♥

2011-09-07T04:55:00.003+08:00

'Cause I got I got I got, I got your back girl~

♥

I'm just glad.

2011-09-07T03:23:00.001+08:00

I feel extremely blessed that I not only have you, but with you, I've found amazing friends, your friends. I love how they always have our best interest at heart. I feel lucky at how concern they are, though at times, they can be AMAZINGLY annoying too. I would say they have helped me directly and indirectly.

I appreciate how Farhan is never reluctant to help me call you up your house whenever I'm unable to get through to your phone. I appreciate how he asks me what's wrong whenever he sense something's not right. Like how he says, "Aku boleh tolong kau, kalau kau bagi aku nombor pompan." He can be all nice and annoying at the same time. I give many thanks to Yul because he never objects and never disagree with wherever I wanna go whenever he tags along with me and Ali just like how you don't mind plying bowling with us and my sister and just get along with her not making her feel alien there.

I'm indebted to Firman for being such a good friend to Ali, always being there for him, me and us like how you were there for Ali as a friend and at the same time help me from losing him during that crazy period of time. & to Syazwan, I'm thankful to you, that you never mind whenever I asks favors from you, fetching my stuffs from other people, so sorry to trouble you :/

C'mon these kinda things might not mean a single shit to anyone, but these little things are what matters to me. These boys can do all these things to the other girlfriends too, I'm not saying that I'm soooo special that they do all those things for me. I'm just saying, thaaaaat, they're nice people and that they have been nice to me! & I'm happy to have a boyfriend who has friends like them(but I repeat, they can be really annoying at times) HAHA :)

I'm here for you, if you let me.

2011-08-27T17:39:00.004+08:00

"Let me first say that you're so charming. Don't you think that you could use someone to charm.

And maybe you like someone to greet at the door after a long day, I'm here for you, if you let me."

Ali Hudzaifi ♥

2011-08-27T17:25:00.007+08:00

"You.. the only boy that I need, the only one that I dream about endlessly. I want to say I think you're perfect. For all the wait, I know you're worth it.

We'll always make it through as long as you got me and I got you. We will take the world in our stray. Anything can be possible, by your side."

"Love is supposed to be simple."

2011-08-23T06:48:00.002+08:00

Well, that's what I've always been hearing from people. I never truly believed in that, before. When I was younger and got into a relationship, I tell my friends, "I like to argue, it makes me happy. I like it when my boyfriend feels guilty and tries to comfort me when I get angry." Sadist much? Yea. That's was exactly how I thought love was about.

I won't deny that arguments and fights makes you stronger, well in some cases, yes. But don't you think too much arguments will also pull you apart? Why should a couple in love, fight that much, have so much disagreements? Why be in a relationship whereby you have to constantly worry about your partner cheating on you with another girl or about his whereabouts? There's no reason to lie if you're not doing anything wrong, isn't it?

Yes, fights, are inevitable, everyone makes mistake, there's bound to be disagreements, but dragging it on for days, ignoring them, does that even makes you feel better? At one point, I'm sure you guys will feel like you've had your fair share of arguments, and you just want to enjoy the feeling you're supposed to have, love, not tears, heartbreaks, hatred. When you truly, sincerely and genuinely feels that, then maybe you're safe to say, you're in love.

Afterall, you are supposed to be in love, why should a relationship have so much heartaches? Don't force love, if you're feeling more heartbreaks than the love itself, why wait any longer? Cause when it's right, it's right.

Stop being such a busybody.

2011-08-17T07:31:00.002+08:00

I've always wanted to get this off my chest, I just don't know who or where to let it out to because basically, everyone's doing it. Here it goes.. people just don't know how to mind their own god damn business. Especially when it comes to relationship matters. So girls are going like, "Why would you let your boyfriend control you?" or "Why does she even bother about monthsaries?" or "Why does she have to let her boyfriend know she's going out?" or "Why does she have to write on her boyfriend's wall when they can text?"

Like c'mon, that's they problem! If you think your relationship is prefect, your boyfriend don't control you, you don't have to inform your boyfriend you're going out, then GOOD FOR YOU. We are happy for you, but why do you even bother about other people's relationships?! They don't owe you anything! Whether people wanna celebrate their relationship every month, or just wish each other or even just forget about it every month, WHO CARES, that's their relationship.

They don't pay you to help so why bother even getting angsty or even THINK about it. Whatever couples do with each other, that's their problem! While you should get a life yourself and stop worrying about others. There's nothing wrong with just a mere thought about it, I guess. But you don't have to publicly let the whole world know what you're thinking, it's unnecessary. You're just wasting your time. Mind your own business.

My past few days, summed up.

2011-08-17T07:18:00.000+08:00

AH.

2011-08-01T22:28:00.001+08:00

I can safely say now that I have never loved a guy as much as I love Ali. I was reminiscing about my previous ex boyfriends and I realized, the feelings different. With them, I have to constantly worry about breakups, there were no trust at all, we didn't cherish one another and it's so obvious, the love wasn't even there. At that point of time, yes, I thought I was so in love. I got blinded by it, I wasted my tears for them, especially him, because I thought that was the kind of guy I wanted.

Obviously I was wrong. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against them, just.. what was I thinking?! Maybe now they're different, they've became a better person, but at that point of time, no.. With Ali, there's mutual respect. He trusts me, even after the incident that happened, and I know he does because when I talk to guys, he doesn't get so worked up anymore, I can chat with anyone I want in twitter and he won't say a word because he knows, there's no reason to be jealous.

He gives me my space, I can see he genuinely cares about me and most importantly, he loves me as much as I do. Yesterday, I realized, it's not impossible for him to fall for another girl and it's not impossible for any girls to fall for him. God knows how much I love that man, and God knows how afraid I am of losing him. I like that we both still are afraid of losing each other despite being together for over 2 years. Hopefully, he'll be the one I spend the rest of my life with. It's too early to say, I know, but I'll be the happiest girl if that really happens, insyallah :>

Anyway, happy fasting Muslims.

Insyallah.

2011-07-29T22:08:00.007+08:00

I’m proud of myself, that at this age I still haven’t clubbed for real, never had even a drop of alcohol running through my body, and most importantly, still a virgin. I know it’s still too early to say, but up till now, Alhamdulillah, I managed to resist the temptation of doing all of the above even with the kind of people I mix around with. Partly because I have a boyfriend who never approves of me clubbing and a mom who constantly controls me, I dare not go. But knowing the rebellious me, I would have prolly gone if I wanted to long ago.

When I was younger, I told myself, I would never smoke and I would never kiss a boy, but I stupidly proved myself wrong. I won’t say I was never tempted to club, everytime someone tells me to tag along with them, I have this urge to go, but I’m amazed myself that I still haven’t and hopefully I will never.

But then again, even so, I’m still full of sins. I mean, no one’s perfect but it’ll be nice if I am able to say that I’ve never touched a guy, saving all those sacred moments for my marriage, it’ll be nice to say I’ve been performing my prayers 5 times a day eversince I was responsible for my own sins, it’ll be nice to say I’ve never raised my voice towards my parents.

People might think I’m here to brag, but I’m in no position to brag when it comes to religion matters. I’m just proud of myself for the resisting all kinds of temptations thrown to me. I hope to change to be a better person, especially a better Muslimah, insyallah eh, hehe.

People say guys who don't smoke, club, drink are hard to come by, well I guess I got lucky?

Happy birthday to you...

2011-07-23T04:25:00.002+08:00

Had my 19th birthday few days back, and though it wasn't so extravagant, I'm glad I still had my mini celebration with Farah and Feeq before ending the night with love. Bowling session with the girls then dinner and dessert at swensens followed by karaoke session with the boy and 19th July ended with supper accompanied by Qaasimy and Faris. Coincidentally Miera and Raihan were there for supper too. Yeap, that's my life, I must say I'm content just being this simple.

The 12 midnight call by Nadiah to wish me, how my mom wished me with her cute smile, the long text message from Massy that teared me up, the sweet birthday kiss from the boy, the unexpected multiple wishes from Syaz, the birthday song from Firman and Ifah, and not to forget... over 200 wishes at facebook and twitter were enough to make me feel like this year's birthday was a blast :> Thank you to all. I love you guys, xoxo <3

Suddenly my blog so yummy.

2011-07-21T13:16:00.005+08:00

Top ten celebrity crushes(in no order):

1. James Franco
2. Francisco Lachowski
3. Alex Watson
4. Johnny Depp
5. Adam Levine
6. Daniel Radcliffe
7. David Beckham
8. Fernando Torres
9. Jude Law
10. Eminem

Oh wait...

Local one.
11. Hassan Sunny

This.

2011-07-06T17:05:00.002+08:00

Eventually the fast text message responses will become slow. The long conversation will cut short. The attention they give you will become neglected. The comfort they give you will become something awkward. The time they have for you will become non existent. The feeling of being close to them will become distant.

But what if it gets too difficult? Is it still worth it?

2011-07-06T16:45:00.000+08:00

Get your facts right bitch?!

2011-07-05T23:31:00.003+08:00

"Kau fikir jadi mat/minah ade mase hadapan ke?

Limit2 kau end up pat immigration checkpoint, chope buku passport orang."

Somebody tweeted this and @isapsua retweeted him.

K, firstly, your own tweets, sounds like a MAT!

"Bak berkata, hidup enggan, Mati tak mahu, Tak perlu la kau ingatkan, AKU TAU LA KAU NI PENIPU!"

"lu fikir lu mana nya besar ah? Bende yg besar cume lu nye K***** ah! HAHAHAHAHAHA! xD"

"eh rileks sua! Gua tga buat chemistry la ! Gangster gangster gini, tetap ade education dok! Hahahaha!"

Yea, those tweets, does that makes you educated? Seriously, which part of it makes you educated? Is it the one that say your friend has big dick?! Or the part that you declare you're a gangster?! At least your friend has a big dick ok! I bet your brain's smaller than his dick.

Secondly, you can't even spell your words correctly, what the fuck is chope chope?! A passport is already called a passport, you don't have to add a 'buku' infront of it. "Bak berkata" BAK BERKATA APE?!

Thirdly, get your facts right before criticizing others. Do you even have any idea what you're talking about? You think easy to get a job at ICA is it? Do you know how much they earn!? You obviously don't, so just STFU!

Can't stand these macam paham kids.

We've drifted.

2011-07-02T20:59:00.001+08:00

As I read my late posts, I realized, the one person I always spend time with, that girl whose name used to appear most in my blog, I've lost her. I don't know if it's truly because of our busy schedule or she has her other own reasons. I would say sometimes I feel like giving up asking you out, but then again, it feels different without you and just so you know, I miss you alot. Yup, I may sound creepy here but to lose a friend, a good friend who has been there for you all this while, who you used to spend most of your time with and now you barely even know what's going on with her life, it hurts.

To be honest, I get jealous when I see you spending time with other people. When I read your tweets of your small meetups with your friends, I wish I were them. I wish you'd have initiated a meetup with me, I wish you'd have initiated going home with me from school, I wish you'd have initiated lunch with me in school. It's not like I don't want to initiate all those, but I know, that by asking, I'll end up disappointing myself, or irritating you. Just know that even when we don't spend time together, I still love you and I'm still hoping we can be close like old times.

The one who always keeps me company.

2011-07-02T16:38:00.001+08:00

Must have been hard for you after what happened yesterday. But then again, what's love without sacrifices. Fret not, if he loves you, he'll wait, be it 3 months or 3years... and knowing how much he loves you, he prolly will :> Futhermore, it's so obvious you're the best he has ever had, he won't let you go so easily. Know that, no matter what... I'll be there for youuuu babe <3 xx

School?

2011-06-29T19:57:00.000+08:00

So I've been scolded repeatedly by my sisters, mom and boyfriend about skipping school. Truth is, I've never been more unmotivated to go to school before in my life. Yea, it's been 2 and a half years, maybe I've gotten sick of doing the same thing over and over again. I remember feeling excited going to school before, I used to get that feeling, but it has faded. Especially with Ali not around to push me to go to school, it's harder. It's not about the transport, I just need him to be there to wake me up in the morning, to make sure I GET UP and have someone to GO TO SCHOOL WITH ME.

Moreover, RP's far from near to Tampines... the walk to the busstop, the waiting for the bus, the 45 minutes journey in the bus itself, and it doesn't just stop there. I have to wait for another bus again or walk to school, and YUP, it's not near! NOT. My grades are pretty bad this semester and I know if I screw up this semester, I will have to go to Year 4, meaning, I won't be graduating with my fellow friends, I understand that but I can't get it in my bloody head that I need to go to school and buck up! Adding on, FYP is being a bitch :/ Sigh, I just have to make it work, have to....

Holiday's ending soon.

2011-04-06T21:13:00.000+08:00

I know I know I know I haven't been updating this poor little blog for a very long time. And I doubt I have anymore readers by now cause it's been dead for a very long time :( Boohoohoo. So anyway, school's gonna start in a week? Sigh. Not looking forward to it at all. Not looking forward to waking up early in the morning, worrying about being late for class, listen to the boring facilitators and moreover, I feel like I haven't truly enjoyed my holidays enough.

Though, I've had my fair share of staying out til late night, making Ali's 2nd birthday with me a success, another outing with Nad and dinners with family. I still haven't spent my holiday with quite a handful of people, like my primary school friends and the usual boy. Miss them. Too many things to do, so little time, sigh.

Put that aside, work have been a chore these past few days. I don't know if it's because of the new team, or cause I'm kinda tired of doing the same thing over and over again. I really really don't know. But so far, the people there have been awesome, so, no problem about them. I still contemplating if I should open up a flea market during Flashbang V, I really have alot of clothes to clear, and mom's nagging about it. Right, I've run out of things to say. Will try my best to update regularly. Till then, xoxo!

Well I guess those explains how I spent my holiday ♥

22nd.

2011-03-19T00:00:00.001+08:00

I don’t mind when our conversations gets a little boring. I don’t mind that when we’re texting, we run out of things to say. When we’re hanging out together but we don't have anything to do, well I don’t mind that either. It doesn’t matter to me because I finally realized that when you’re truly in love, every moment spent together doesn’t have to be breath-taking. You still feel like the most blissful person alive even through the most unexciting times, and you will feel completely comfortable together because you know that just having each other is more than enough. It surprises me that even up till now, we're madly in love with each other. Up till now, just looking at you, my heart skips a beat.

Happy 22nd love ♥

Breakeven.

2011-02-26T01:01:00.000+08:00

Took for granted.

2011-02-25T02:27:00.002+08:00

If you find a girl who's willing to go through hell just to keep your relationship going, you really shouldn't take her love for granted. Likewise for guys.

Someday..

2011-02-25T02:23:00.002+08:00

My worst nightmare: That one day, any girl will take my spot. That one day a girl will sit with you, laugh with you, smile with you & have a good time with you. That one day a girl will realize that you're amazing. That one day that girl becomes your girlfriend. That one day she takes my spot for good. That one day you will forget about me because you're busy thinking about her. Yeah, that scares me the most. Because I want to that girl. I want to be the only girl. I don't want anyone to take my spot. Why? Because, if anyone take my spot; there won't be anyone else who can take yours.. which is probably going to be the worst reminder that I lost my spot to her.

But.. life goes on. One day, I shall be happy with another guy. I will sit with someone else, I will laugh with someone else, I will have a good time with someone else. I will have someone who thinks I'm amazing. He will be my boyfriend. He will take your spot for good. I will forget about you because I'm busy thinking about him. He will be the only guy :') That's why, I have to be strong now.

I see God in you my love.

2011-02-21T02:32:00.000+08:00

You are my paradise, you’re my obsession

You’re all my wishes put together

You ease my spirit, you’re the shade for my eyes

You knocked on the door of my heart

I touched you with my gaze

Sometimes it’s your fragrance

Sometimes it’s your words

Without asking, this world became mine

You light up my heart. You’re a lifetime of treasures

I may not know much but this I do know

I see God in you my love, what am I to do?

You deeply reside in my heart

My weeping heart smiled

God has joined this couple together

You came softly and tormented me

Our shadow teased and kissed me

When you smile, when you get shy

It’s like the spirit inside me dances

You’re my good fortune my luck

21st.

2011-02-19T00:00:00.012+08:00

We look for love, not because it sucks to be alone watching movies, not because it's sad to eat meals alone, not because it's nice to cuddle up with someone on rainy days. We look for love because we want to be accepted for the sloppy way we dress, for the clumsy way we eat, for our bad hair days, and for the plain-ness of ourselves. Because love is an act of acceptance from all our imperfections. You, have accepted all those, and that's why I love you.

Happy 21st Month Love. Xoxo.

CNY + Bowling.

2011-02-05T18:29:00.000+08:00

Ali followed me to Novena yesterday to get uniform for work yesterday. But I didn't get much, one top and a cardigan. We were rushing for time, afraid we might get caught in the rain while on the way :( Headed to Ken's place after that, played some games, the boys JUST HAD to play soccer. When will they ever get sick of it? So we were all kinda doing our own things after the PS3 came. Left for Safra Tampines for bowling session with my cousins after that. We had supper at Al Salam then finally back home :)

Feels good to be surrounded by people I love lately. From friends, to boyfriend and family. Yeah, I've been a happy kid lately. Laughter really is the best medicine. Dinner with family, a small gathering with friends and bf for CNY, bowling session with cousins, aunties and uncles then finally a meetup with my two darlings today.

Some pictures taken yesterday. I can't upload many pictures cause not blogger decides to have quotas for the number of pictures that can be uploaded? Is it? If yes, then _|_ you blogger. If not, can someone help me then? Why can't I upload too much pictures?

Nothing beats family love.

2011-01-30T22:15:00.000+08:00

Blessed to have them in my life.

Clothes, Baju, 衣服, कपड़े.

2011-01-23T03:39:00.002+08:00

Dear readers. I have tons of clothes that I wanna get rid off.

Click HERE and help me clear them ♥

20th.

2011-01-19T00:00:00.016+08:00

Do you know how amazing it is to finally know how it's like to be treated right by a guy? All this while, I've been lying to myself thinking that all the other guys before this, treats me good. I set my expectations low and constantly allowed myself to be hurt because I didn't know what was right. But little did I know they're nothing compared to what I have now. I thought I knew what it feels like, but I was wrong. Totally. Wrong.

So girls, never settle down for just anything. Love yourself, make sure you get the best. Make sure you are treated the way you are supposed to be by the guy you choose to be with because that's what you deserve. And yes, I've finally found that one person who makes me feel special, and he's responsible...

I had the time of my life, and I owe it all to you.

Happy 20th month baby, I love you.

2011 has arrive.

2011-01-01T19:56:00.003+08:00

And so 2010 has come and go. I guess I only have memories of it to bring along with me. I won't deny that 2010 has been an amazing journey for me because I've learn so many valuable things that cannot be taught by anyone else but myself. I learnt the importance of forgiving, the importance of letting go, the importance of friendships and family. Being in the a long term relationship also has taught me alot about love, I suppose.

First and foremost, 2010 took away my dad, that one dad I have, and nothing I do can bring him back to my family and I. I hope he's having a better life there because he have suffered so much, here with us. I love you dad.

To my family, thanks for never giving up on me. Thanks for always being there for me, not only when I'm broke(hehe) but you guys have always been the ones to make me happy and laugh whenever I'm home. Or when I'm down, you sisters always have plans to make me enjoy myself. And mom, thanks for your delicious foods you serve me with especially after a long tiring day at work or school, I really am thankful for that. I love you girls :')

To my sweet boyfriend, 2010 wasn't easy for us. So much has happened. Things I don't even want to remember. I'm glad you're the only guy I spend the whole of 2010 with, because they were meaningful. You taught me alot. And I'm glad we pulled through each and every obstacles thrown to us and still be together now. My love for you has never fade. You never fail to make me laugh, and eventhough you never fail to make me cry every now and then, you know how to make me smile once again. Cheers to our 2nd new year, together. You're the best. I love you.

To my massy sayang, I know we haven't been spending so much time together last year, and without a doubt, I used to feel like you have forgotten me but no, not anymore, it only makes me realize that this is friendship, it's about still being friends, bestfriends and get along so well with each other no matter how long we go MIA from each other. This year, I guess will be a life changing one for you, I wish you all the best. I want to see you happy after all the sacrifices you've made and the waiting. I want to share those happiness with you. I love you.

To my naddy baby, I guess we are the perfect soulmate. We never fail to come out with new plans. I'll consider our self lucky because we not only have ourselves for each other, we have our prefect boyfriends for each other :) Thanks for always hearing me out babe. Let's keep up with this amazing friendship we have. I love you.

To my favourite boys, I know I don't seem like I care or like I miss you guys, but from the bottom of my heart(SAP), I really do miss each and every one of you. I know I have been very distant from you guys and you guys might think I only come when I don't have friends or when I'm sad but that really is not the case. I love you guys.

To my primary school friends, I miss outings with you all! Let's plan out more outings together and I'll try my best to save as much money for our holiday trip together. I love all of you.

Let's all make 2011 an amazing year for us all.

Much love, Tiqsy♥

Not pretty.

2010-12-25T19:57:00.003+08:00

I say I’m not pretty. Not because I’m looking for attention or compliments, but because that’s truly how I feel. I don’t believe that I am pretty because I can see everything you don’t. I see how my stomach looks when I’m standing in my bra. I see the face under the make up. I see every little flaw about myself, even if you can’t. I say I’m not pretty because I’d be lying if I said I was.

Love, love, love.

2010-12-15T14:00:00.001+08:00

Love, you're so distracting. Am I overreacting, for feeling this way. And ever since I met ya, I can't keep my attention and you are to blame. Your love's a permanent distraction, a perfect interaction, a feeling so extreme. I lost my appetite to eat and I barely get to sleep cause you're even in my dreams.

And I thought that I was strong, but I knew that all along, this was out of my control. So I fell into your hand and I don't know where we'll land. I'm just going with the flow. Someday, I want to run away. This feels so perfect, it's breaking my heart. Yeah we could, we could stay here happy or after summer, be two worlds apart.

Your love is coming like a freight train. Ain't nothing gonna stop it, it's heading for my heart. Your love is bigger than a rain cloud, it covered up my whole skies. It's filling up my heart with love, love, love, love, love. More than I ever need.

Disagree?

2010-12-07T13:01:00.002+08:00

Best explains.

2010-12-07T00:50:00.002+08:00

Boy:
Did I hear you right?
Cause I thought you said, let's think it over
You have been my life, & I never planned
Growing old without you

Shadows bleeding through the light
Where the love once shined so bright
Came without a reason, don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?

Girl:
But when I need you, you're almost here
And I know that's not enough
And when I'm with you, I'm close to tears
Cause your only almost here

Boy:
I would change the world, if I had a chance
Oh won't you let me, treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me, oh please protect me

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you?

Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted

2010-12-06T17:24:00.006+08:00

When will people stop letting me down over and over again?

When will people ever need me more than I need them?
When will I ever learn things the hard way?

When will I ever stop lying to myself?
When will I ever feel special again?

When will I ever be truly happy?

If you love me, you wouldn't wait for things to happen on its own.
Yer obviously just not that into me.

F&F

2010-12-05T17:44:00.002+08:00

Love just wasn't enough.

2010-12-05T17:27:00.004+08:00

You don't only give others second chances. You give yourself second chances too.

This is not me.

How's life people?

2010-12-04T01:24:00.002+08:00

Neglected my blog for a very long time. One of the reason is because, I do not like the new blogspot -.- I hate changes. Even little changes, I hate, I hate. Hahahaha! So anyway, these past few weeks, its either I go home straight, work or watch BRAG in school. SHL won SIT with the score 3-1 in the finals, which was just now. Good job SIT. & congrats SHL ♥

My grades has been consistently bad because I skipped lots of lessons causing myself to miss out alot on my studies, thus having difficulties catching up :( Boo. I shall try and use the upcoming holiday to catch up. Things with Nadiah and Massy are going great. I've finally realized that bestfriends are not just about meeting every single day. It's also about meeting once in awhile but still be able to get along very well with each other without fail every single time we do.

But of course, I'd love to have a girlfriend whom I can hang out with everyday, do almost everything together. Unfortunately, not everything has to go my way. Ali have been a great bestfriend and boyfriend to me. & I love him. Period. Nights readers. I've got to sleep now cos I'm visiting my dear Natasha tomrrow and catch ICC afterwards. XOXO.

Harry Potter.

2010-11-21T02:59:00.001+08:00

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows was awesome.

Goodnight readers ♥

prettiest nicest person ever= ika(:

2010-11-19T01:05:00.001+08:00

omg, greatest compliment from someone i dont really know! thank youuuu tasneem! yer pretty and nice too! hope to bump into you again somewhere, someday. nice seeing you :D :D

Ask me anything/whatever, yeay! ♥

18th.

2010-11-19T00:33:00.002+08:00

A real relationship; Has fights. Has trust. Has faith. Has tears. Has hurt. Has sweet smiles. Has genuine laughter. Has snorts because of the laughter. Has weird, stupid, unnecessary arguments. Has patience. Has communication. Has secrets. Has jealousy. And most importantly, love. This is all just a mess that turns out beautiful & an experience that can never be forgotten.

I'm glad that this relationship is not as perfect as how we expected it to be, because that's not how I want it to be. That's not how we're learn from each other. All those fights, I'm thankful for them because that just shows how strong we are to overcome all of those and still be together, till this day.

I’m truly glad that I get to go through this beautiful experience with you, Ali Hudzaifi ♥ Happy 18th month Sweetheart. Xoxo.